I? I love myself. Hi! The second part of loving yourself. Today we will analyze in what situations it is difficult to stay in this self-love. I asked on the forum and I also have some of my thoughts. First, let’s think about it in general terms. What situations are we when we don’t love ourselves? As if to define it. Generally, there is the thought that something is wrong with you, the feeling that you have failed and something needs to be done about it. As if … This is so, so inconvenient. This is something wrong. Especially when you love yourself and it’s okay and feel like you’re falling out of it, it’s unpleasant. But that’s okay because it’s a sign, just like pain. As I said about suffering some time ago, this is a signal that something is wrong, that something needs to be done, to react so that it does not get worse. As if here we are trying to answer the question: What to do, how to take out this splinter that is sitting in us, that we feel that something is wrong? When we cut ourselves, we physically know how to do it, physically as if it is quite obvious what to do when we have a physical splinter. On the other hand, such a psychic splinter, such a splinter due to the lack of self-acceptance is a bit more complicated to remove. Not loving ourselves can be reduced to such an internal conflict that we do something or we are different than we would like to be than we expect, than society expects us, or some norm. As if the other side of this loving yourself is forgiving yourself. And here it is related. If we fall out of forgiveness, we are often drawn out of the other too. If we do something that is just wrong, something that we feel bad about, we may as well fall out of loving ourselves by not forgiving ourselves. They are like two sides of the same coin. First, it is very important to separate these two things: loving yourself and you as a human being. The same goes for other people too, but let’s focus on You. You as You, as you are, mere presence, existence itself is beautiful and it meant to be loved. And sometimes the appearance, behavior, certain reactions or attitude can be changed. And these things are okay, we may not like them. Just don’t connect that you are your hand, you are your behavior. Take responsibility for it, as much as possible, but loving yourself is needed to change what is still wrong. Suppose a situation where you make a mistake, you cannot cope with something. You just know that if you were stronger, better prepared, it would just be better, but you are not. Again, we can say whether it is forgiveness or loving, but there is such a situation. Then what? I would remember the words I once wrote down as such a advice. I’ll do better next time. That’s it. We cannot change the past, but we can try to do something better next time, learn from mistakes, from failures. I also used to say that to transform our failures and falls into strength. Another thing: if you think you are in a tragic situation, perhaps you are. Consider these words: Great people will rise out of great falls. You don’t have to be great to fall, but you have to be great to get up. You get great when you get up. You may fall as a little one. Complexes. Whether it’s physical or maybe some behavior, maybe you have some dysfunctions. It does not matter. Think of it in terms of how you got a car and you gotta get somewhere. You have nothing else, you don’t really have any other choice, so you sit down and do the best with this car. Maybe you can fix something there, if you know how, invest in something, etc. But you have this car and you reach your destination with it if you want Of course, you can also sit in the ditch and tell yourself that you are useless, you got a bad car and it’s all for nothing. Others have better models. Show that in this situation you are able to deal with yourself, for yourself, for others, to show how strong you are. Often people who do not love themselves put others above themselves, that no, I will help this one, I will help this one, and I keep forgetting myself. I did it too. Realize that you are unable to help others if you have not helped yourself yet. You cannot love others if you do not love yourself. There is nothing you can do or at least not much, for other people when you need help yourself. This situation: Airplane You’re flying somewhere high and there’s a malfunction. Oxygen masks fall from above. The principle is very simple: First, you put the mask on yourself. Even if your little child is next to you. Take care of yourself first, because if you take care of your child, you won’t help yourself anymore, and you don’t know if someone will help you. If you help yourself, think about yourself, take care of yourself, then you will be able to help this child and maybe others. Another thing: Others tell you what’s wrong with you. Someone comes and tells you that no, it is all wrong, you are not useless, and so on. You can take it as information, and that’s it. It says something about you, it says something about others, about their attitude towards you. But if it is something you already know, you have learned nothing new. There is no reason to react negatively in any way. You can even make a joke while keeping a distance to yourself. But the truth is that a lot of people, well, don’t have that self-confidence yet, don’t have that self-esteem yet. And loving yourself is just about working on it, to rework such situations, whether at work, live or even in the evening, when you sit down and remind yourself a difficult situation from years ago, or even recently, to be able to deal with it look from a distance and think about how you should have behaved better. Maybe next time you can do it. Maybe not, but it’s worth a try. Another thing is that people who attack others often do not love themselves and thus try to make up for it, to compensate for it. The same happens when they buy themselves some cars, expensive equipment, etc. Of course, it does not mean that when someone buys an expensive car, it means that they do it because they do not love himself. But people also have this behavior simply. Loneliness. It is as if someone told you that you were good for nothing but nobody said a word. It is as if those around you are telling you no, nobody wants you. But maybe the root of this is precisely because you don’t love yourself, so why do you require others to love you? This is one thing. Second thing: There is a danger when it comes to loneliness that it will fall into such a … such a vicious circle that if you isolate yourself from people because you think that they feel bad about you, or they don’t like you, then those people stop asking you if you want to go out with them or interact with you in some way. It just winds up and you sit alone. Even among people, when you are, you think you are useless. You have to open up and let yourself be known, even loved. Or maybe you have friends but you feel useless because you are not doing well at work, you are not doing well at school, somehow everything is falling apart. It is definitely a difficult situation and there is no doubt that it is hard, but it is in such moments that you most need this power, this strength what comes first from loving yourself and then further working on yourself. This is what we do to prevent such situations from overwhelming us. And when you get out of such situations, you will become stronger. And maybe this is your test, this is your lesson to love yourself. Consciously face your problem, and even if it does not get easier thanks to this, your attitude will turn fear into motivation. Still want it to be how it is if it’s not right? So you actually have nothing to lose. Try it. It is even worth falling over to reach your destination. Or maybe you need some passion, maybe you need something that will give you such joy and then in this joy, you already love yourself automatically. Maybe just bet on joy, on spending time in a nice way. Although even a part of life will be such that these will be responsibilities that you cannot bear for today. Over time, these too will be easier to handle. And someday they will be a pleasure, because maybe you will change your job and your whole life the way you want. For me, the worst such blow in this work on myself when it comes to loving myself was when I did not keep my word. Not even that I gave it to someone, but I promised myself something and I was not able to keep it. It may not be all that important to all of you, but I think it should be that the words you say should have value as well as yourself. If you’re saying something, don’t throw your words away. If you promise something especially, or even just say it, don’t let others misunderstand you. The word is important. Or another situation when you do something against yourself, ie. Maybe your surroundings force you to do so? Maybe you are getting married even though you don’t believe in the church at all? Maybe You going to school even though you think that you are not learning anything there, that it is a waste of time? Maybe… Sometimes you have to do certain things to better get out of a difficult situation. Sometimes there is no alternative and you have to experience it as best as possible, you have to get as much positive, good as possible out of it. A good person from a difficult situation will come out even better from every situation, will get something good. An evil person, on the other hand, will turn it around to justify why he is evil. If someone has been beaten as a child, they understand how wrong it is, so they will never do it themselves. Or he or she can take it as an excuse, since he has been beaten, he can hurt others as well. It tells about what a person is like. And you? What are you? Know, love, accept. I? I love myself and I love you too. Hold on. Bye!